My Parents are driving me crazy?
We go to my parents house almost every Sunday, today was no different. Until my mom got a bug up her butt. Here is my story. I read somewhere that when feeding a baby make sure they have a dry diaper and you just focus on them and feeding them. Well when I go to my moms they pass my 2 month old around like she is a play toy. She is the 1st Grandchild. anyway first my sister is feeding her then my mom wants to chime in then my mom is usually like oh Grandpa wants her. Its like they all want a turn until they find something they can't do with one hand. But Mommy (ME) has a million hands and I can do it all. So my mom got mad today cause I said no when she wanted to take my daughter from my sister who was feeding her. So we left! What do you think? and when I told my mom I read this she just said something crazy. I'm a first time mom how will I learn if I don't read.
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5 Answers
Okay, don't take this the wrong way, but you need to relax a little. Everyone loves babies! Especially grandparents! As the mom, you need to set ground rules that are reasonable and that you are comfortable with. If you want to be the only one to feed your baby then let them know how you feel You cannot get angry at them for loving your child and wanting to show her love! Your parents may have a difficult time with your rules at first, but everyone needs to remember....this is not about you but about the happiness and safety of the baby!
Being a new mom can be very tough but without the help and support of family and friends it can become a lot tougher. Keep in mind, you parents might be trying to help in their own way. They might want to give you a break from feeding the baby. Try not to over react and just be straight with them. It is your child and your wished should be honored! Good luck!
I understand about having pushy family members. You, being a first time Mom, are going to be a little over protective at first. Learn to relax and breathe. Remember your Mom was a Mom with babies too. You are the result of her mothering so she obviously did her job well. Being that your baby is the first grandchild there is a novilty there that won't wear off. Remember that they are overwhelmed with the experience of being grandparents and just want to love your baby up. If it's just the feeding thing that bothers you then as the Mom of this child you have the right to set limits and they may need to be reminded of that. Politely state that you aren't comfortable with the baby being passed around mid feedings. To avoid it, you should feed the baby and when they come to get her from you just say "in a minute, let me get her to finish eating first". Sometimes it is hard for family to set and follow limitations and as her Mother you need to be the one to do that. But don't stress so much over it. The baby is going to be fine if one or 2 feeding aren't done by the "book".
Smile, it increases your face value!
Jodi
Smile, it increases your face value! :)
Jodi
If she is eating, then they should wait until she is done. It's not great to distract a child from eating. So, I understand why that would annoy you. It sounds to me like this is something that came to a head. You may have overreacted without realizing because its been built up. I have had these issues with my inlaws mostly. I read that according to the AAP you shouldn't give your child peanut butter until they are 3 years old to prevent them from developing the peanut allergy. Since I am allergic to everything under the sun, I didn't want Trey to have it.... well, they have given it to him. They also gave him soy milk after I asked them not to because of an allergic reaction I had when I was 7 months pregnant. They always conveniently forget.....Oh, not to mention honey before he was 1....and I told them ALL the time why, and it says it on the friggin jar.
My advice.... don't wait until your boiling over. Tell them how you want it done and why, and you don't have to mention that you read it. Tell them the doctor said so....whatever.
There is nothing wrong with reading about stuff. You should read about everything you can but decide what you feel is right.
Maybe you should take a break from your weekly visit... seeing them to much may also stress you out.
~#Briann#~
~#Briann#~
Tell them you would love for them to feed the baby, while sitting and only one personata a time. No passing her around mid bottle.
Its hard when you know how to do things best and they all want a turn.
You shoudl know, there will be a time when they wont want to help out, so if you can, i know its hard, go out for a walk and use this little bit of free time to breathe.
My kids (18 and 15) were only grandchildren on BOTH sides. Talk about aggravating from my stand point! It was worse with my son (18). I drove myself nuts the first six months until an older friend said something that stopped me in my tracks. She asked me "are you alive?" I said, yeah, well...duh? She said "well, you survived your parents and so will your kids". My advice? You SHOULD explain that for your child's digestion they can't be passing her around while she's eating. Your relatives wouldn't want to be passed around while they were trying to eat dinner. So politely explain that and stick to it. Don't leave though. You have to stand up to them. On other areas though, you're going to have to back off or you'll drive yourself crazy. Allowing extended family to be involved in your child's life is a blessing to them, your child, and you. As far as what the books say, from personal experience, read less parenting books and do more parenting. Your kids grow up TOO fast. Trust your own instincts. Don't waste the time you could be enjoying your kids by reading books that you won't remember six months later anyway! You'll have the memories with your kids that will last for a lifetime.