Family fued in the delivery room
Well I decided to try the castor oil...it didn't work for me but i'm fine. Didn't dehydrate or anything like that. I now have a planned induction at the hospital this Thursday the 5th! I'm very excited to see my baby boy. I don't think I have ever been so excited to be in pain! But hey just like they say its pain with a purpose! Does anyone have any idea's on what I should do about my family though. Because of the flu going around and rather thick in my area, there is only one person allowed in the delivery room and my biggest fault is that I just can't say no! My mother is coming up from California to be here for my son's birth and I feel horrible telling her she can't be in the room but its just not an option. I do however want her to be my fiance's 'substitute' for when he needs a break. The only problem with that is that my step mom who I am very very close with wants to be in there too! I just need a nice way to tell her I guess. This is my second baby but with my first son I just caved in and let like 12 people in the room so I didn't hurt any feelings. I'm actually excited about the new rule but it's just going to be hard...
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Oh boy. When I delivered I didn't want ANYONE else in the room besides my husband. I just knew my mom and my sister would stress me out too much. (Love them both dearly but we just see things differently too often.) I had thought I'd made it clear to my sister that she could come in after the baby was born but not before, but she showed up at the hospital when I was delivering! I remember her showing up at the door right when I was in the middle of pushing and I told the nurse not to let her in! I felt sorta bad but this moment was all about me, my husband, and our new arrival. She totally understood and was so thrilled to be the first one besides my husband and I to hold her new niece. (My mom and stepdad were on their way from Oregon.)
So you should NEVER feel bad about saying no. People do understand. It is YOUR birth and it should be entirely up to you whom you let in. Too many people (or the wrong people) in the room, can cause stress, which can slow labor.
So tell your mom to expect to be on hand to relieve your husband. She'll still get to come in right after the baby is born right? Even if she has to wait until you're in the recovery room (assuming that's different from the delivery room...mine was the first time), she'll still be there in the baby's first moments. What more can a grandma ask for, really? As for your stepmom, it's up to you whether you want her to be a second reliever or just be one of the first visitors after the baby comes. Either way she'll feel honored just to be part of your moment, and I'm sure she'll understand that you can't do anything about the regulations.
Good luck, with all that and with your birth!!!
Patti
SAHM in SoCal and administrator of the Sleep Forum group, http://www.mothersclick.com/group/sleep-forum and Tri-Counties Moms, http://www.mothersclick.com/moms-club/tri-counties-moms-sb-ventura-slo-c...
After the first half hour I didn't even want my husband in the room! There was just too much to deal with. It was also very full just with the nursing staff.
For health and safety reasons (which is easier than saying no you don't want to), I'd say no to everybody except the husband.
When we had our oldest, my mother was there the whole time and it made me a little crazy, it made hubs a lot crazy but in some ways I was glad she was there because I had no clue what I was doing.
Fast forward to baby #2 and we decided no one was coming in and it was just hubs and me. That was the best decison ever and the smoothest labor (delivery was another story!) ever.
I think you're right to be concerned about the flu. You have a couple of options and tell the doctor/nurses that you don't want anyone in who has been sick or is sick, sniffles, coughing, whatever. If you do allow anyone in, you can make them wear a mask to protect you and the baby. Nurses and doctors don't mind being the bad guy in situation like this and are more than willing to make sure you're comfortable. Make sure it's on your chart when you come in that morning.
As for grandmas switching off, perhaps you can have your mom come in to give your hubs a break and then have your MIL come in to relieve your mom, but only do that if you really want to. There's no rule that says you have to let anyone in at all.
Just do what you and your husband feel is right and make sure the hospital staff know it. Don't feel bad repeating it to new nurses or shift change nurses either.
Good luck and congratulations!
With my first baby on the way, I had heard many stories of delivery "guests" and the situations that can arise.
I didn't know how I was going to feel at the time, so I told my husband that I wanted it to be just me and him and I didn't want to call anyone until the baby was here.
I told my family that no one was going to be in the room besides my husband, so there was no point in them just waiting in a waiting room for Lord knows how long, so we'd call them afterwards.
Everyone was understanding and didn't say a word about it....probably because they know me and know that once I say something, that's it. No arguing or debates, it's just the way I'm going to work.
I personally don't understand how people can have more than one in the room during delivery. I just could not deal with it. A friend of mine had everyone coming and going and it made me anxious and I wasn't even the one in labor!You'd want to have space, I'd think, to feel what you're emotionally feeling, deal with what you're physically feeling like and concentrating on yourself and no one else.
And you don't need the stress of choosing who to be in there and who not. In your case, if it's between your mom and your stepmom, it should be your mom (but that's totally my opinion).
It's your time. They've had their babies, let them have yours the way you want.
I wish you a very safe, happy and healthy delivery!!!!!!!!!!